Me and My Kitty

OK- I have never really been into cats. At least not to the point where I ever wanted one of my own. Sure pay small amounts of attention to other folks cats, cause they seem to love me and wanna be all up in my lap, as if they know I am not interested and therefore want to convert me or something. Not that I have some vendetta against the cute and furry, and hey there are times and places where purring is definitely a good thing. But I grew up with dogs, big dogs- German Shephards mainly, and a Doberman when I was in junior high. Granted i did try to convince my mom she wanted a cat in teh house when I was in high school and a friend’s cat had kittens, but even though I brought it home- mom said “no way, bring it back”. I was old enough to not cry or get all sentimental- my friend rainbow ended up keeping it and another kitten and they grew to be so well fed and round that they didn’t bother with any fast movement other thanthe brisk walk to the cat food bowl.

But poor little Sebastian managed to get stuck under our house the other night, and proceeded to squawk all night. We let him be, thinking his feral mom would return to claim him after hearing his pathetic cries, but she was nowhere to be found. So we managed to pull him out of the vent and made him a little kitty home out of a box. Honestly, I didn’t want to like him. All whiny, pathetic and kitten like- oozing cuteness as if that would be enough! After all I swore off cleaning after other’s poo for life after 5 years of changing diapers, and was adamant about not ever having a pet. Sheesh two teen-agers is quite enough thank you very much!

Then came needy little Sebastian with his little medley of “mew”s. He hadn’t eaten in at least 24 hours, had been kicked to the curb by his parents, and was so little and well, cute.
How could I resist? I tried, believe me. Equally fussy and needy as a baby, he whined constantly and really didn’t know how to eat yet. My partner is allergic to cats too on top of everything else, and seeing as how the kitty will only create bills, whereas my partner pays bills- it doesn’t even seem like a viable option to keep the kitten at all.

We took it with us to a pet store to get a litter box and formula, since it still needs to be taken care of until we figure out what to do with it. I thought, hey Walidah and the kids can deal with it, I’ve got other stuff to do. Plus it picked Halloween to join our household, the kids had party plans, Walidah and I had a reading- it wasn’t looking good for our furry friend at all. But I caved in, brought Sebastian with us to the reading and ended up holding it the entire time, which made for an interesting performance for sure.

We managed to get him to eat, but I continued to believe that the cat was temporary. Although I did out a blanket in the dryer for him so he could be cozy in his box, I wanted to make him comfortable, after all he has abandonment issues and as someone who works with youth regularly I know the importance of love and comforting in the early years. I am not cold-hearted, I just don’t want any more work.

Then, this morning he was the mewwing noise permeating the household requiring attention. I had workshops to go to, children to inspire, but first i had to warm up a kitty bottle of formula. Did I mention how much kitty formula stinks? Well it does, a lot. But little Sebastian is getting the hang of a bottle. I also think he is starting to get that we are going to take care of him, so he is calming down. He even played with me this morning biting and licking me- and purring with content after being fed and held. Then I put him back in his box and after a short span of mewing he actually quieted and went back to sleep. I wanted to avoid any kind of attachment. Wanted to deny responsibility for his well being. But once I post a picture, you will know exactly why I crumbled. I never thought I would be a cat person. I mean sure, I get them since we have a lot in common. We want our way, want attention when we want it and then would rather not have anything to do with folks, are all about “me, myself and I” and basically not about everybody else unless it meets our ends or needs, want to be loved and cuddled on our own terms but don’t feel the need to give that back... I get cats, but usually at a distance.

I have to admit in my writing workshops, all my examples involved kittens. I am even now, as I write, thinking “how is Sebastian doing?” He’s all soft and fuzzy, with that cute little kitten face. He is adorable and he likes us. I am thinking that if we have to pass him along to someone else, I want it to be a neighbor, or someone we know so I can still hang out with him. Wow- I never thought I’d fall for a kitten. I am so not gullible or easily swayed by that kind of thing- but see, Sebastian is different- so don’t go thinking that I got all soft or something. I am just making an exception that further proves the general rule... yeh... that’s it.