I would have hundreds of thousands of fans, a tour bus, a private jet and travel the world with my now all girl band, the Rusty Kittens. We aren't playing around here, we are dedicated. We put in like 8 hours on a Sunday afternoon- cause we got heart, we're hungry and determined. Today was my big debut as drummer- I did pretty well if I don't say so myself. Walidah played vocals and guitar switching with Ekela to add some variety.
If we keep this up... you might just see us at the local coffee shop, with real instruments doing the damn thing.
See, this is why I don't need time off- it's not like I do super constructive things like apply for grants, map out curriculum... I play video games and read teen fiction. So this is how the other half lives... I could get used to this! Way less stress than college professor-dom, sure beats cleaning house. I did cook an awesome dinner outdoor grill style today, so it wasn't like I didn't accomplish anything else. It was yummy. Fish and vegetables, garlic bread, seasoned potatoes- all cooked in foil on the grill. Oh and I watched some Smallville.
No, I take back what I said about not needing time off. I totally needed this- I almost never play and relax, during the school year and usually am all crazy during the summer doing a zillion things. Screw all of that! Good luck getting me back to work in September!!!!
Sunday, July 27, 2008
Wednesday, July 23, 2008
Central Oregon Adventures
Today on my way back to Portland I am riding with my camp friend "Piper." He assists with the photography workshops and is a true inspiration at camp with his lovable quirkiness that is immediately endearing and inspiring. His personality and sense of style create spaces for youth to be unique and less confined by the rigorous notions of how we should do coolness and gender, which is so crucial to middle school and high school students who are bombarded with narrow definitions of humanity in general. I love that!
All year, he worked with my camp roomie Sister J. Rey on a project called "Hello Neighbor" in North Portland and Central Oregon. If you live in around those parts it is quite possible that you have seen the beautiful portrait banners hanging on sides of buildings or displayed in business windows. They are so beautiful. Youth photographed and interviewed members of their community, asking them a multitude of questions about their histories, their connection to the community and their dreams. A very powerful project, sparking all kinds of interest and dialogue.
So today we are taking the scenic route through the central Oregon cities, so Piper can photograph the banners in their display environments throughout Bend, Redmond, Terrebonne and Madras, and I am along for the ride checking out the towns I will work with next year through Caldera during the Year of Spoken Word. I am excited to see what I will help create with this year's project. Piper and Sister J. Rey have set the bar pretty high and I hope to do something equally impacting with the word.
I will try to post an album of Central Oregon shots in a folder soon, feel free to check them out! During July and August I am torn between missing home while I am at camp, and missing camp after I am gone…
Thanks for the ride Piper!
All year, he worked with my camp roomie Sister J. Rey on a project called "Hello Neighbor" in North Portland and Central Oregon. If you live in around those parts it is quite possible that you have seen the beautiful portrait banners hanging on sides of buildings or displayed in business windows. They are so beautiful. Youth photographed and interviewed members of their community, asking them a multitude of questions about their histories, their connection to the community and their dreams. A very powerful project, sparking all kinds of interest and dialogue.
So today we are taking the scenic route through the central Oregon cities, so Piper can photograph the banners in their display environments throughout Bend, Redmond, Terrebonne and Madras, and I am along for the ride checking out the towns I will work with next year through Caldera during the Year of Spoken Word. I am excited to see what I will help create with this year's project. Piper and Sister J. Rey have set the bar pretty high and I hope to do something equally impacting with the word.
I will try to post an album of Central Oregon shots in a folder soon, feel free to check them out! During July and August I am torn between missing home while I am at camp, and missing camp after I am gone…
Thanks for the ride Piper!
Tuesday, July 22, 2008
A Different Kind of Gamble
So I am at training for camp. For those who haven't been to summer camp in ages, or have never been there, let me set the stage. Imagine if you will…
The setting: wilderness and a clear blue lake far removed from the bustle of the city. The nearest town is a but a map speck, consisting of one main road sprinkled with small businesses which close down early in the evening. The main restaurant with a bar closed at 10pm on a Saturday. Phones don't call outside the area, unless you have a calling card or people who love you enough to accept collect. Cell phone reception is pretty impossible unless you stand on one foot, under just the right tree with the wind blowing in a northeastern direction. Wi-fi, do I need to elaborate on its nonexistence? Only one computer is set up with an internet connection for about 40 staff, so you can just guess how available that is.
The rules (or at least a few key ones): No fraternizing, no drinking, and no smoking.
The people: Well of course there is clearly a wide variety of participants. People who genuinely care about youth but don't necessarily have tons in common beyond that and the fact that we are all together for a huge chunk of our summers. And let's be real, while we are all amazing (seriously the staff and volunteers this year are such an incredible crew), that doesn't mean we aren't a bit odd. I mean, we willingly chose to come way out here to work with teens in bum$%* Oregon, and we like it. Nothing wrong with that, it is a testament to our passion for youth work, the future, the arts, the natural environment, etc… but it does point to the fact that chances are high that we are not quite like the general population. We are a quirky bunch.
The result: New and interesting forms of entertainment. And that my friends is what I want to tell you about, but I didn't think any one would be able to understand without first knowing the circumstances.
So here is a little game we play- now when I say we I by no means am referring to the bulk of the staff, maybe like 20%. You've heard of poker most likely, its nothing new- but what makes it crazy is what we gamble and put on the line. It can't be a drinking contest, it can't be about stripping, and well no one brings a bunch of money out here cause there's really no point in that. So we gamble with what makes sense and it looks a lot like double dog dares.
Before he cards are dealt everyone antes up with a task on the line. For example, if you lose or fold you have to take 2 drops of tobasco on the tongue. If you are willing to take that risk, you are in and get dealt a hand. Then people raise the stakes as we go around the circle, someone might add in eating a couple shakes of salt, licking the bench, putting your hands in the compost, smelling everyone's left shoe, holding a wad of dirt in your mouth, wet willies, and so on. It teaches you a lot about your own limits as wells as those of others at the table.
So, of course I played, it is a tradition amongst some of my closest camp comrades- which must say a lot about me, if birds of a feather flock together. Today I ate a burnt up wood remnant from the campfire, licked bark dust, sprinkled cayenne pepper on my tongue ate salt, sniffed 7 people's shoes, licked the stair railing, pulled a couple of hairs from my head for my comrades to eat (hee hee), took a deep wiff of kitty litter smelling compost and tomorrow will have to spend a couple of hours with honey on my eyelids. And while many of those things were unpleasant, there were worst things that I opted out of by folding, and even more nasty stuff that others had to do since I was fortunate enough to have several decent hands. Why take the risk? Cause it is soooooo funny to watch others do stupid stuff and to have the ability to input on what that stupid stuff has to be. I mean, at least I didn't have to eat a piee of someone's hair or put ice down the front of my own pants like others did!
Clean adult recreation at its finest!
Well I have to get to bed, cause campers come in the morning, although it clearly age is nothing but a number, cause these sort of antics must say something about our levels of maturity. I mean if your friend drank dirt water, would you?!
My answer: If your hand is good enough, you won't have to!
The setting: wilderness and a clear blue lake far removed from the bustle of the city. The nearest town is a but a map speck, consisting of one main road sprinkled with small businesses which close down early in the evening. The main restaurant with a bar closed at 10pm on a Saturday. Phones don't call outside the area, unless you have a calling card or people who love you enough to accept collect. Cell phone reception is pretty impossible unless you stand on one foot, under just the right tree with the wind blowing in a northeastern direction. Wi-fi, do I need to elaborate on its nonexistence? Only one computer is set up with an internet connection for about 40 staff, so you can just guess how available that is.
The rules (or at least a few key ones): No fraternizing, no drinking, and no smoking.
The people: Well of course there is clearly a wide variety of participants. People who genuinely care about youth but don't necessarily have tons in common beyond that and the fact that we are all together for a huge chunk of our summers. And let's be real, while we are all amazing (seriously the staff and volunteers this year are such an incredible crew), that doesn't mean we aren't a bit odd. I mean, we willingly chose to come way out here to work with teens in bum$%* Oregon, and we like it. Nothing wrong with that, it is a testament to our passion for youth work, the future, the arts, the natural environment, etc… but it does point to the fact that chances are high that we are not quite like the general population. We are a quirky bunch.
The result: New and interesting forms of entertainment. And that my friends is what I want to tell you about, but I didn't think any one would be able to understand without first knowing the circumstances.
So here is a little game we play- now when I say we I by no means am referring to the bulk of the staff, maybe like 20%. You've heard of poker most likely, its nothing new- but what makes it crazy is what we gamble and put on the line. It can't be a drinking contest, it can't be about stripping, and well no one brings a bunch of money out here cause there's really no point in that. So we gamble with what makes sense and it looks a lot like double dog dares.
Before he cards are dealt everyone antes up with a task on the line. For example, if you lose or fold you have to take 2 drops of tobasco on the tongue. If you are willing to take that risk, you are in and get dealt a hand. Then people raise the stakes as we go around the circle, someone might add in eating a couple shakes of salt, licking the bench, putting your hands in the compost, smelling everyone's left shoe, holding a wad of dirt in your mouth, wet willies, and so on. It teaches you a lot about your own limits as wells as those of others at the table.
So, of course I played, it is a tradition amongst some of my closest camp comrades- which must say a lot about me, if birds of a feather flock together. Today I ate a burnt up wood remnant from the campfire, licked bark dust, sprinkled cayenne pepper on my tongue ate salt, sniffed 7 people's shoes, licked the stair railing, pulled a couple of hairs from my head for my comrades to eat (hee hee), took a deep wiff of kitty litter smelling compost and tomorrow will have to spend a couple of hours with honey on my eyelids. And while many of those things were unpleasant, there were worst things that I opted out of by folding, and even more nasty stuff that others had to do since I was fortunate enough to have several decent hands. Why take the risk? Cause it is soooooo funny to watch others do stupid stuff and to have the ability to input on what that stupid stuff has to be. I mean, at least I didn't have to eat a piee of someone's hair or put ice down the front of my own pants like others did!
Clean adult recreation at its finest!
Well I have to get to bed, cause campers come in the morning, although it clearly age is nothing but a number, cause these sort of antics must say something about our levels of maturity. I mean if your friend drank dirt water, would you?!
My answer: If your hand is good enough, you won't have to!
Wednesday, July 9, 2008
Dream World and Creations of the Subconscious Mind
So I have a really overactive imagination while dreaming or awake, but I thought that I would write about the latest dream, cause it was such an interesting mix of things. On one side it reminds me that I should really consider what I watch before going to bed and on the other how much is possible in REM states of consciousness.
So I never remember every detail of my dreams, but specific things leave powerful imprints that stay with me after the fact. So last night's creation was a combination of reality tv and a reality I wish for every day.
The silly: I was dropping off a miscellaneous dream friend at the Tila Tequila mansion, cause they were going to be on the show. Tila saw me and decided that I should also be on the show. It looked nothing like the spot on tv, it was instead a pretty regular house, except there were lots of people trying to decide what room they were going to stay in. I worried that I would be like the woman she chose this season all undecided, since I wasn't really sure that she was my type.
The serious: I don't know if it was a continuation or separate, but my mom shows up in the dream. My mom passed over a year and a half ago (wow that is crazy to type- it doesn't seem like it has been that long yet it seems like an eternity since I saw her at the same time). She was basically paralyzed from the waist down for the last several years of her life and in a nursing home. However, in my dreams she is making this steady progression back to her earlier abilities.
At first when I would dream about her, she would still be in a wheelchair, or somehow miraculously driving which was always a scary contradiction in my dreams where my mind would argue with itself thinking that she shouldn't be driving in her condition (she was a huge fan of driving cars with kick when she was able to do so.) And I would usually start bursting into tears in my dreams, mourning the fact that she was gone- which made dreaming about her really difficult for me upon waking, cause I felt exhausted like I had been really been crying and the sadness would linger all day if not for days plural.
But last night, or this morning, she was getting out of the wheelchair and slowly walking, as if she was regaining her strength and the ability to walk. And instead of being overly analytical and breaking myself out of the dream with my conscious knowledge, I was able to go with it and hang out with her. I am sure that as supportive as she was throughout my life, if in the dream she was hanging out with me outside of the Tila mansion and I had made the choice to enter the realm of reality t.v bi-sexual dating, she would have supported that as well, if I was serious about it. She was my number one fan as well as an amazing mom.
I went through a similar process after my great-grandmother, the other relative I was closest to in my life, when she passed when I was in high school. At first when I would dream about her, I would fracture the dream by realizing seeing her was impossible since she had passed. Then over time, I stopped denying the possibility and enjoyed our time talking and being together. I want to get to that place with my mother in the dream world. Gosh, I miss her so much. Maybe as time goes on we will be speeding cross country in a sporty car, without any fear of her driving skills being impaired- convertible top down, wind slapping our hair around while we listen to Maze singing Happy Feelings.
* Note to self: No more Tila before bedtime... although I do wish her and everyone else on the planet luck finding love. The world is often a cruel and lonely place to live.
So I never remember every detail of my dreams, but specific things leave powerful imprints that stay with me after the fact. So last night's creation was a combination of reality tv and a reality I wish for every day.
The silly: I was dropping off a miscellaneous dream friend at the Tila Tequila mansion, cause they were going to be on the show. Tila saw me and decided that I should also be on the show. It looked nothing like the spot on tv, it was instead a pretty regular house, except there were lots of people trying to decide what room they were going to stay in. I worried that I would be like the woman she chose this season all undecided, since I wasn't really sure that she was my type.
The serious: I don't know if it was a continuation or separate, but my mom shows up in the dream. My mom passed over a year and a half ago (wow that is crazy to type- it doesn't seem like it has been that long yet it seems like an eternity since I saw her at the same time). She was basically paralyzed from the waist down for the last several years of her life and in a nursing home. However, in my dreams she is making this steady progression back to her earlier abilities.
At first when I would dream about her, she would still be in a wheelchair, or somehow miraculously driving which was always a scary contradiction in my dreams where my mind would argue with itself thinking that she shouldn't be driving in her condition (she was a huge fan of driving cars with kick when she was able to do so.) And I would usually start bursting into tears in my dreams, mourning the fact that she was gone- which made dreaming about her really difficult for me upon waking, cause I felt exhausted like I had been really been crying and the sadness would linger all day if not for days plural.
But last night, or this morning, she was getting out of the wheelchair and slowly walking, as if she was regaining her strength and the ability to walk. And instead of being overly analytical and breaking myself out of the dream with my conscious knowledge, I was able to go with it and hang out with her. I am sure that as supportive as she was throughout my life, if in the dream she was hanging out with me outside of the Tila mansion and I had made the choice to enter the realm of reality t.v bi-sexual dating, she would have supported that as well, if I was serious about it. She was my number one fan as well as an amazing mom.
I went through a similar process after my great-grandmother, the other relative I was closest to in my life, when she passed when I was in high school. At first when I would dream about her, I would fracture the dream by realizing seeing her was impossible since she had passed. Then over time, I stopped denying the possibility and enjoyed our time talking and being together. I want to get to that place with my mother in the dream world. Gosh, I miss her so much. Maybe as time goes on we will be speeding cross country in a sporty car, without any fear of her driving skills being impaired- convertible top down, wind slapping our hair around while we listen to Maze singing Happy Feelings.
* Note to self: No more Tila before bedtime... although I do wish her and everyone else on the planet luck finding love. The world is often a cruel and lonely place to live.
Monday, July 7, 2008
If I could make one change...
Well, if I had some magical power to change something about the world there would be so many great places to start: World peace, equality, equal distribution of wealth amongst all the worlds inhabitants, ending hunger, the end of capitalism... as they say in improv "Yes, AND..."
Now, on a much smaller and lesser scale, If I could change one thing about the work that I do... (outside of the obvious making more money so i could be debt free- damn student loans!)... I would abolish paperwork! I freaking hate paperwork. SO I am "off" this summer. Translation: rather than working at 7 jobs I am only working on a couple. However, that does not erase the fact that every organization that I work with gave me stacks of paperwork to fill out for the 08/09 school year. Criminal background checks, W-9s, I 99s, contracts, fill in every blank and tell us all about yourself forms, evaluations, curriculums, rubrics... So today, I sat down and committed to finishing my last pile, at least I think it was the last. (Well, until I get another one.) Not to mention I have just begun the process of looking into getting grants to publish my manuscript, which involves... you guessed it! Paperwork! Woo Hoo!
So I am looking for someone who LOVES to do paperwork, ooh and grade college essays and tests, and compile contact info and lists in a database, do mailings... you know all the really fun stuff like that. As far fetched as that request may seem, it feels more probable than getting my first list of requests fulfilled.
Actually, I want to make an addendum. Even though I hate the dreary monotony and wasted time involved in filling out forms, IF doing paperwork could end 'isms, create socio-political- economic equality, create peace and provide a better planet for all- I would do it full-time for the rest of my life. Which doesn't mean that I would do a 180 and love paperwork, but obviously as irritating as triplicate forms are, it can not compare to the tragedy of the planet's plight. For the good of people and the children I would make that sacrifice, cause that is the kind of person I am.
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